A TwoEdged Sword
by I Got Tired of Waiting
Summary: WIP Book Four, Chapter 04 of Hiding Under the Ninth Earth ¤ What does it take to bond a family? Harry, Severus, and Perrin learn it takes more than just blood.
1. Part I : To the Hilt

Hiding Under The Ninth Earth  
**Book Four : A Two-Edged Sword**

**Part None : Glossary of Hawaiian Terms (Not necessarily in this part.)**

**Alua Au** : a deliberate mis-naming of a Hawaiian advocacy organization which provides 'court support' such as marriages, record home-births and Hanai family adoptions for native Hawaiians. Any documents they issue are considered legally binding in the local state courts.  
**brah** : friend  
**da kine** : Catch-all word used for just about anything.  
**go bust/get busted** : break or crush  
**Good grinds that** : lit. Good food that  
**humbug** : bullshit/crazy/stupid/a problem  
**kiawe** : mesquite  
**okole** : ass/derriere  
**Opihi** : a rock limpet one usually eats raw  
**Pass-o-guava** : Passion fruit mixed with guava juice  
**slippers** : flip-flops  
**streamers/whizzers/gunrolls/blackcats** : loud, banging firecrackers  
**t'ing** : thing  
**you stu** : you stupid idiot

**Part I : To The Hilt**

**2 July 2004**

The board's violent wobbling was Perrin's only warning before he tumbled off its smooth surface, splashing head-first into the warm, salty water. Again. As he sank beneath the surging waves above him, his mouth firmly closed against the briny taste, he swore he could hear the others laughing at his less-than-stellar performance. Again.

Comfortable for the moment, he thought it might be far better to stay down here with the fishes swimming curiously around his legs; peaceful and quiet it was, without the mocking teasing the others gave him over his awkwardness. Well, Sarah wasn't so bad, but even she would get that shining light in her eyes that meant she really wanted to laugh even if she was too kind to do it. Yes, it was good here. Warm and floaty. Silent.

His lungs starting to burn, he envied the fish their gills. Surely there was _something_ he could use to let him stay in this magical place for just a while longer--like the whole summer? He'd only been here a couple of weeks, but...

A swirl of turbulent water pressing on the top of his shoulders heralded another presence as a strong hand threaded through his longish hair, roughly pulling him out of his speculation. Up and up it tugged him through the shifting shafts of pale turquoise light towards reality's brightness above. Cleanly breaking the ocean's surface, he took several deep, penitent breaths before turning to face his 'rescuer'. Water dripping into his eyes, Kalani shook his head, the flying droplets flashing and sparkling in the late morning sun. As one powerful arm repetitively swept the water, keeping him afloat, the other--holding the leash to Perrin's loaned board--remained outstretched towards Perrin, ready to steady him if need be.

Treading water, Perrin looked behind Kalani, noticing that the others were already well on their way back to the black-sand shore, some riding the waves with an ease that made him sigh, the others lying on their boards paddling lazily in the mild swells. Kalani didn't say anything, but Perrin could tell from the sharpness in his gaze that he wasn't fooled by Perrin's failure to appear immediately after falling off the surfboard. Uncomfortable and embarrassed, he focused on the others' progress.

"Gillyweed," Kalani said after a long while.

"Huh?" Perrin asked, his startled glance swinging to the older man.

"A magical herb. I grow it out back. It's what Ben and I use when we go deep sea spear-fishing. When you're old enough and a better swimmer, we'll take you."

"Spear-fishing," Perrin repeated dumbly.

"Or when we just want to... escape," Kalani added. "It's... nice down there, isn't it?"

Perrin looked away to stare longingly at the Hana children his age, half of whom were already checking their gear on the beach. He felt distinctly out of place with them, stiff where they were loose and easy, pale and--English where they were brown and--local. Worlds apart separated by a common language--and magic. Remembering their recent not-so-gentle ribbing, he shivered and sighed. "Yeah. It's quiet."

Kalani followed his gaze. "They don't mean to be unkind; it's just their way. Their laughter is a good thing, maybe not the same as where you're from. It means they accept you; it's their silence you need to worry about." He smiled when Perrin snorted. "Trust me, they like you, so they treat you the same as anyone else. How well you take it and how you respond will determine if it continues that way. They'll accept your... silence and... shyness, but not if it's sullen or arrogant, nor will they tolerate boasting. You're doing fine."

Perrin threw him his best, 'Yeah, right,' grimace. He groaned and took the old wooden board's leash from Kalani when he handed it to him. "I'm never going to get this right."

Kalani chuckled. "You're trying and that's all that matters. Hey, at least you stood... for a few." He grinned. "If it helps any, Sarah and Kumo and the others have been riding the waves almost since they could walk. You wouldn't believe how many times Kahea' fell off this same board before she 'got it'. But--"

They bobbed up as a large swell caught them, raising Perrin high before knocking him below the water. Blowing air as Kalani had taught him, he pulled on the board's leash against the press of water pushing him down. Breaking the surface, he gulped in air as he grabbed the board's edge, his whole body feeling suddenly drained and tired. Kalani spit a mouthful of water to the side and smiled. "And that's why you need to use the leash; this training board is an old hand with novices and will keep you from... sinking too far," he lightly teased, raising a brow. "Come. Tide's coming in; it's time to go back to shore. You'll not learn this in a day and Harry will skin me alive if you're burned."

Somewhat reassured, Perrin let Kalani help him back on the board; at least he could paddle fairly well. Following Kalani's swimming form back to the beach, Perrin smiled at the thought of Harry 'skinning' anyone. Now _Severus_, though...

**3 July 2004**

Even during the days when he'd not been free to say so, watching Harry chase a Snitch had always held a certain appeal for Severus. Drawn as he was to anything of beauty, Harry's fluid grace and quick daring could make him hold his breath for the sheer splendour of it. Next to him, the other players--surely as skilled--had appeared clumsy and inept, their efforts paltry when unavoidably compared to his excellence.

Today was no different as he stood at the window in the dining nook, his eyes eagerly consuming each dive, each twist, each length of stretching speed. Harry was in his element, a fey creature of the wind, his wild hair streaming behind him, every lean inch of him extended fully over the broom as he played with the practice Snitch he kept handy for exercise. Watching him now, Severus felt his body tighten in response to the picture Harry made; his husband was a beautiful man and he couldn't help but envy the broom. Were it his body Harry gripped with such passion, such finesse... He shook off his fancy; he well knew how those things felt, for Harry gave them to him whenever he wanted.

He smiled. He was such a lucky man.

And a most regretful one as well; he had to leave to meet with Albus. Which was probably why Harry had chosen _this_ time for his play for, of course, Harry knew how much he enjoyed watching him, the little tease. Almost to the limits of acceptable tardiness when it came to matters with the old man, he was about to close the sash when Harry suddenly stopped. Just stopped. Hovering in place hundreds of feet in the air, as the Snitch danced around his head just out of reach, Harry leaned forward, his back tense. Uneasy, Severus half-climbed in the window seat, following his apparent line of sight.

Someone was coming towards Hogwarts via broom, a tiny speck at first, growing ever larger until the man's dark hair and almost-familiar stocky build was visible, but not his face. Or at least not to Severus, but Harry, so much closer and facing the man head-on, obviously had a much better view. Drawing nearer, the man stopped short, much as Harry had, and quicker than thought, he turned the broom around and sped away. With a shout, Harry and his old Firebolt leapt after him.

"_Accio Broom,_" Severus shouted; Harry's touring broom slammed into his hand almost immediately. It wasn't as fast, perhaps, but it would get him there. Mounting the newer broom, he soared out the window, following them both. Pushed to its maximum speed, Severus kept the two specks in clear sight as they flew over the Forbidden Forest. Saving time, he cut across the zig-zag path created by the man's evasion of Harry's pursuit. He didn't question the urgency making his heart pound so painfully against his ribs, nor his little nagger whispering that Harry needed his help; something was very wrong.

Over the lake, he drew close enough to get an idea of what that something was. Harry and his target were duelling. Rapid sparks of light and spell energy flashed between them; Harry had obviously hit something vital for they were slowing appreciably, enough so he should be able to catch them up in a few minutes. His heart in his throat, he watched Harry reach out for the other man's broom as if it were just an over-sized Snitch. He never made it, for his quarry cast a spell not at Harry, but at his broom. An instant later, Harry started losing altitude and, leaning desperately to his right, he headed back to the shore.

"No, Harry!" Severus shouted even though he knew Harry couldn't hear him. Damn it, if Harry crashed, Severus had a better chance of rescuing him unharmed out of the lake than the forest, but like all land creatures Harry's instincts were taking him away from the water. Nearing the spot they'd been, he dared take his eyes off of Harry long enough to glance at the man slowly retreating as Harry fell. A split second was all he needed for the man's bulky shape to register: Mendino! His blood boiling in frustration, there was no choice as to whom he would follow.

His heart heavy with dread, he dropped into the trees where he'd last seen Harry enter the silent forest.

**3 July 2004**

Sometimes, Perrin thought, silence was the best course of action. It wasn't earning him many friends, but it did have its uses and it was something at which he was fairly skilled. Like yesterday when he heard about the party tomorrow. A _lu'au_ they called it. When they were discussing how many people and how much food and fireworks! on the beach, he'd stupidly thought it was because of him. As he'd said nothing, he'd been spared the embarrassment when they'd also said it was for something called "Independence Day," an American holiday that just happened to coincide with his twelfth birthday.

And, surrounded as he was by a large group of sweaty, swearing local men and older boys, each the size of a small horse, silence still seemed his best recourse. Especially considering one of them, the biggest man Perrin had ever seen, had an axe slung casually over one shoulder--a big axe, the blade of which was easily as wide in inches as Perrin had in years. He paused in his digging to watch them wrestle with something in the bed of a pick-up truck.

"Ho, Chan! How soon that imu done?" one of the men called in their direction.

Sweating profusely, Ben paused in his labour to shout back, "At least an hour before I light the fire... unless you want to come help?"

The man, Charlie, Perrin thought his name was, laughed easily, his yellowed teeth flashing against brown skin. "Nah. You make them bettah than anyone I know."

"Must be magic," Ben murmured to Perrin, nudging him with a smile. "Eh, back to work or they'll notice the sand's flying without us digging."

Perrin didn't say anything, but bent back to his task, which consisted of placing his shovel in the hard-packed sand and throwing it over his shoulder to a growing pile behind them, which masked the fact that four times more sand came off the shovel than went on it. His back to the other men, he nonetheless could follow their actions.

"One hour to fire? Plus six more? Eh, Charlie, it can't stay on the truck that long."

"No kidding. We'll have to ice it."

"Eh, good t'ing you bring your beer tub."

"Yeah, shame for the beer," Charlie replied, then shouted, "No, no! The other way, you stu. Back legs gotta go first."

"No way, man. You do it dat way, the head go bust."

"So? I'm gonna cut it off anyway."

"So, brah. Mina have my okole that head get busted. She wants it for the pot next week."

"She making da kine again?" There was a pause of silence. "Good grinds that."

"Get that rope. Is the ice ready?"

"Steady... Steady... No! Left! Left! What? Fucking buggah--your mom drop you when you was one baby?"

"Hey! That's my foot!"

"Fuck, man. Dis buggah's big."

"No, no, NO! Not dat way. Fuck, you trying and--OOF!--kill me?"

"This is so humbug."

Perrin hazarded a glance over the growing mound of sand and just as quickly wished he hadn't. Almost losing his hearty lunch, he watched in horrified fascination as the men manoeuvred a huge, bloody boar hanging by its front legs off a tripod winch, set over the back of the truck's bed, onto a piece of plywood set flat on the hard sand. Its head tipped back at an odd angle, exposing a pair of wicked tusks, Perrin realised its throat had been sliced through, all the way to the bone. Gulping some air, he hastily returned to his task, desperately trying not to be sick.

Glancing at him sideways, Ben spared him some sympathy; dead pig was not the prettiest sight at the best of times, even if one were inured to it. Muttering, _"Finite Incantatem,"_ he leaned on his shovel. "There, I think that's deep and wide enough. Big pig Mano caught; should be enough to feed everyone tomorrow."

Gratefully setting the shovel aside, Perrin nodded. "What's next?" he asked quietly, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed hard several times.

Ben smiled in sympathy. "We add rocks and wood." At Perrin's raised brows, he chuckled. Pointing with two fingers to Perrin's left, he said, "See those piles over there?"

Perrin's eyes followed until they rested on a large pile of lava rocks, each about the size of his fist and a small mound of cut gnarled logs as thick as his arm. His eyes widening in dismay, he asked, "We have to move _all_ of them?"

"Yeah, but I have ways of making it easier. Besides, they're only the beginning of the things we need to put in there after the pig's wrapped and the bottom stones are hot."

Confusion marred the boy's features as Ben absently noted he was finally getting a hint of healthier brown to replace his winter pallor. "I don't understand."

"Didn't Kalani tell you what an imu is?" When Perrin shook his head, Ben sighed and muttered, "Eh, love, teach the boy to surf, but not how to build an imu?" He chuckled at Kalani's skewed priorities. "C'mon. Digging's thirsty work. Let's go to the house and get something to drink and I'll explain."

Urgency made him hustle the boy quickly to the front of the house; he didn't think him ready yet to see them cut off the head. Sure enough, Perrin almost jumped out of his skin when they heard the shouted, "Eee-yah!" followed by a massive thunk as the axe Charlie wielded so well bit deep into the plywood. Given his wild eyes and shaking hands, Ben was hard-pressed not to give Perrin a hug, but suspected how well _that_ would be received. So instead, he settled a friendly arm across the boy's shoulders as he led him across the lanai, surprised when Perrin leaned into him. Well, maybe a hug would have been okay, and Ben filed the information away for later use.

Leading him to the far side, they entered the outdoor storage room. When Perrin pulled away and made another noise of confusion, Ben explained, "Severus doesn't like sand in the house and we're both loaded. So I installed this old second-hand fridge for them--" he opened the door and rummaged inside, the cold almost painful on his hot skin "--last month so we could get drinks and such without having to go inside." The seal squeaked tiredly as he closed the rust-spotted door. "Not much to look at," he said, handing Perrin an icy Pass-o-guava, "but it works great."

He twisted the top off a Bud Light and chugged half the bottle down in one long throat-working pull. Sighing with pleasure, he watched incredulously as Perrin polished off the whole can of juice in three long gulps. Belching lightly, he held up the empty and asked, "Where do I put this?"

"Blue can on the side," Ben said, tugging the fridge door open again. The seal gave way with a reluctant slurp and Ben captured another juice and bottle of beer before wrestling it closed again. He sighed in affectionate frustration as he watched Perrin cautiously peek around the side of the house before setting off to put his can in the recycling bin. Poor kid, Ben thought, he's still feeling his way around. He wished Perrin would ask for help more; it would make things so much easier for him, but he could understand the boy's reticence since he'd been living with someone like him for years.

Deciding not to wait on Perrin, Ben walked around to the front lanai to the bench by the door and, flipping his slippers to the side, put his bare feet up on a nearby stout table. By the time Perrin returned, he'd finished the first beer and had popped the second. Sipping it slowly, he gazed out over the ocean rather than stare at Perrin taking the second juice and sitting next to him.

Sipping thoughtfully, Ben began, "An imu is a steaming pit. We'll line the bottom with kindling and kiawe, a kind of wood used for smoking, then we'll pile those rocks on top. Then we'll light a fire and let it burn to coals; takes about six hours until the rocks get white hot from the fire. Once the rocks drop onto the coals, we'll lay chopped-up banana stalks across them and..."

"Why banana stalks?"

"They don't burn easily and provide a support for the food, keeping it away from direct heat." When Perrin nodded, Ben continued, "On top of the banana stalks we'll layer about a foot of Ti leaves--they provide the moisture and steam when they get hot. By this time the pig will already be gutted and dressed, with chunks of meat wrapped in Ti leaf 'packets'--or at least that's how Aunty does it--some folks just put the pig in whole, but..."

Ben almost laughed at Perrin's scrunched-up face. "Yeah, that's what Aunty thinks, too." He took another pull on the bottle. "Anyway, they'll place the food on the Ti leaves and then layer another foot on top followed by a shallow layer of banana leaves--they're bigger and you need fewer of them to cover the whole pit. Then..."

Perrin eyes were wide. "There's more?"

Ben did laugh then. "Just a few more things. After banana leaves comes a layer of wet burlap, a thick tarp and _then_ we get to shovel all the sand back on top to seal it. Then we go home."

"Seems a lot of work for a meal," Perrin groused.

"Maybe," Ben noted with a snort, "but it's sooo ono when it's done." Perrin stared. "Good--ono means good or delicious."

"O-no," Perrin whispered and Ben knew he'd commit it to memory just like he had all the other words he'd learned, even if he'd not actually used a one.

"Actually, we get the easy work. Others have to watch the imu overnight to make sure it doesn't leak steam." Of course, most of them would stay up all night talking story and be so drunk by sunrise, they'd probably sleep through the meal. "And we won't have to dig it back up tomorrow to get the food out, nor clean it up."

Hearing Perrin heave a sigh of relief, Ben changed the subject. "If it's okay with Severus and Harry, you can help shoot off fireworks tomorrow night. After all, you'll be twelve tomorrow." Well, that certainly sparked some interest.

Sitting forward eagerly, Perrin asked, "Really? What kind? How high do they go? What shapes do they make?"

"Whoa, there," Ben said, raising his hand with a laugh. "The big aerials--" Perrin's face went blank "--the big fireworks that explode high overhead?--" Perrin's eyes lit with bright understanding "--are done only by the experts in the fire boats off-shore." Perrin quickly schooled the disappointment out of his face and Ben thought sadly no child should know how to do that.

Taking another sip of his warming beer, Ben struggled to find a way to explain that wasn't too foreign; with the few minor misunderstandings they'd had in the last two weeks over American terminology, he'd learned to be careful. An idea forming, he set the beer aside on the lanai and glanced to both sides to make sure they were alone. Drawing his wand, he thought, if you can't explain it, show it. Inscribing a circle, he murmured a spell he'd not used since he'd taught Kahea'. Slowly the memories in his head formed within the circle, images of a much-younger Kalani setting off streamers and whizzers and gunrolls and blackcats and a whole slew of banging, flashing, exploding, sparkling firecrackers and small fireworks--enough to delight any boy's pyro-manic heart.

A wide grin lighting his whole face, Perrin exclaimed, "Wow! When do we start?"

Ben chuckled. "Just after sundown, and only if your guardians say it's all right."

Perrin's face fell. "Severus will never let me..."

"Eh, you don't know that. I wouldn't be surprised if Severus isn't already an old-hand with explosions." Ben smiled at Perrin's knowing giggle. "Don't worry, they'll be here tomorrow morning, so I'll have plenty of time to talk them into it."

Ben was sorry he'd have to interrupt the first genuine smile they'd seen on Perrin in a couple of days, however... "Well, sitting here's not getting the job done," Ben said, standing with a sigh. He picked up the empty beer bottles and tossed them into the recycling bin as they passed it, Perrin tossing in his can as well; they'd separate it later with a handy little spell Kalani had devised years ago. No sense getting messy when you didn't have to.

In the same vein, he taught Perrin the spell to make the rocks lighter as they shifted them into a huge wheelbarrow, a small, surreptitious twist of his wand making its bed big enough to take all they needed in one trip. Trundling it back was hard work, but they soon had it at the side of the hole they'd dug earlier. Several trips later, they had all the materials they needed and set to work.

"Bugger!" Perrin swore when he dropped a rock on his foot, his face flushing when he realised what he'd said. Rubbing the sore spot briefly, he picked up the next batch of rocks, handing them to Ben. As the older man carefully lined the pit, Perrin said quietly, "Sorry. I guess I didn't think this through when you asked me to help. I don't know why I thought this would be better."

"Well, you could be up in the mountains gathering Ti."

"Yeah, I suppose, but that seemed so..."

"Sissy?" Ben supplied, highly amused, but striving not to show it. Perrin looked away. "And this seemed more... manly?" Perrin shrugged. Ben gazed back at the mountains far off. "Harry helped the Aunties and Kalani collect the Ti."

Perrin blinked. "What did Severus do?"

"He stayed here and helped with the pig."

Perrin tilted his head in question. "Helped do what with the pig?"

"Slaughtered, gutted, and dressed it. He's not really all that squeamish."

Perrin privately thought of some of the more disgusting potions ingredients and wasn't very surprised to hear it. "Severus is much braver than me."

Ben's kind gaze held him captive. "I don't think that's true, but he is better at hiding his fear... and revulsion than most of us."

Perrin glanced again at an old bathtub Charlie had placed in Severus and Harry's sideyard, shuddering as he eyed the hoof poking out of the mound of melting pink ice.

Ben said teasingly, "Don't worry, you're too young to work with that monster. When the others get back you're welcome to go with them to gather crabs and Opihi at sunset; they'll need all the hands they can get down at the tide pools. Charlie and I can finish the pit. Maybe you can have your chance at the boar next summer."

"Or maybe never," Perrin muttered firmly. Finally meeting Ben's eyes, he straightened his shoulders and said, "No, I said I'd help, and I'll stay until we're done." He glanced at what they'd accomplished so far. "Do you need more rocks?"

When Ben smiled and nodded, holding out his elegant, yet work-worn hands, Perrin felt something impossibly tight loosen inside him and smiled back.

**4 July 2004**

"Breathe, damn you, Harry! Breathe!"

Severus didn't know where to start. Harry's breath hissed wetly with each feeble rise of his chest, the most obvious cause of which being the ragged broom handle speared through his chest; he suspected he would find the other end peeping out the back. Or maybe it was the awkward twist Harry's spine had assumed over the tree root beneath it. He didn't want to even contemplate the numerous broken bones, two of which were protruding through the skin of his left shin. He shook himself; now was not the time to panic.

"Breathe, Harry. Breathe with me."

His hands shaking, Severus took several deep calming breaths of his own before lowering his hands to Harry's temples. Entering the _Sanos_ pathways, he flinched past the internal injuries he couldn't repair, concentrating on finding any curse damage that might prevent him from transporting Harry. Dimly, he could detect _something_ there, something foreign and possibly harmful, but buried so deep, his limited skill proved insufficient to determine what it was. He would just have to chance it. Warily he withdrew.

"Please, Harry. Breathe. That's it... In... Out... In... Out... Good."

The stabilising spells were simple; he knew better than to remove the broom handle and the other injuries merely needed strong cushioning charms to hold them in place. He'd already staunched the bleeding; he vaguely recalled that had been the first thing he'd done. Levitating Harry and securing him across the broom in front of him with a spell was easy; placing the warding shields to protect him in flight proved more difficult, but after several heart-stopping moments, they were ready. Slowly rising, he soon manoeuvred them above the trees. Setting his sight on the far distant castle, he set the 'Always-on-Course' charms and they headed home.

Halfway there, Harry started choking. Severus immediately turned him to his side facing slightly downwards, and tried to remain dispassionate as a sporadic stream of foamy blood and mucus flowed out of Harry's mouth. His hand firm on Harry's hip, he scooted back a bit in the seat to avoid the nub of the broom handle in Harry's back now pointing at his groin.

_Breathe, love, breathe._

Near the castle, he circled to the front. With a thought, the doors opened for him and he flew Harry through the castle as fast as he dared, the walls moving for him to make a straight path all the way to the infirmary. Those doors opened for him as well and he heard himself shouting for Poppy.

_We're here, love. Breathe, just one more... and another... Breathe._

They were moving. Someone was removing his shields around Harry, but he couldn't see them, his concentration wholly centred on the chest rising less and less with each passing second.

_Breathe, love, breathe._

"Severus. Severus? Let go of his hand. Severus! Oh bother, just move him to the side, we'll not get him to leave."

_Breathe, love, breathe. Please, don't stop._

TBC


	2. Part II : The Edge

Hiding Under The Ninth Earth  
**Book Four : A Two-Edged Sword**

**Part II : The Edge**

**4 July 2004** Continued

Perrin wondered if _anything_ eaten in Hana ever looked good before it was cooked. From dead pig, he'd graduated to dead Opihi, which resembled nothing less than a thick garden slug, protected turtle-like by a flattish fluted shell. According to his Hana friends, who had done little all morning but grouse about collecting them last evening from the tide pools, "the frickin' buggahs are a bitch to pry off the rocks." Well, they weren't too much of a bother now; the ever-shrinking pile of them in front of him did put off quite a stench, rather like fish left out in the sun too long, but certainly nowhere nearly as bad as some of Severus' potions. Personally, he didn't see the appeal, but judging from the number of times people tried to steal the shucked ones--getting their hands roundly smacked by Ben's Aunty Nona for their efforts--obviously somebody liked them.

His mind elsewhere, Perrin's water-wrinkled thumb deftly separated the Opihi from the pearly inside of its purple and white shell; a slight flick of his forefinger sent the plump limpet flying into a clear glass bowl, slowly filling with other such sacrifices. Sometimes, when he wasn't paying attention, he'd accidentally flip the glistening mollusc straight up, where it was snagged mid-air by Kani's sharp beak as a tasty treat. This was usually followed by someone grumbling, "How come the 'pet owl' gets some?"

Sitting to his left, Aunty Nona untangled and chopped fresh Limu on an old, scored and stained wooden board. The reddish-green seaweed had looked like tightly spun steel-wool until she'd taken the clump's ends in her hands and pulled; now she had a large airy ball of it in front of her from which she plucked off bits as she needed them. When she'd offered a piece to him, he'd warily accepted, more out of politeness than any real wish to try it, and had been surprised. From what he'd seen of it in the ocean, he'd imagined all seaweed would be slimy and taste of old dead fish; it certainly felt that way. While he wasn't quite certain he liked its salty taste, he _had_ rather enjoyed its strange crunch as it 'popped' in his mouth when he chewed it. He rolled his tongue, prying it against his molars; now if he could just get it unstuck from between his teeth...

Across from him, Kumo was thinly slicing long stalks of green onions harvested from Aunty Rina's garden. Perrin was perversely satisfied that Kumo, who might be graceful on a surfboard, would have earned nothing but scathing contempt from Severus were they ingredients for his cauldron. As it was, Aunty Nona had already lightly scolded him once for his sloppy workmanship, to which the stocky youth had muttered, "Who cares, it's only _poke_." While Perrin could understand the sentiment, (after all, the raw fish dish _did_ look rather revolting, even if it tasted 'ono') he was also coming to appreciate the Potions master's viewpoint about neatness; sometimes it was really important, so why not do it that way all the time?

Next to him, Sarah was slowly peeling Kakui nuts from their thick, soft shells. He'd not known until this morning that the green balls hanging in the pretty tree behind his guardians' house were even edible. They'd picked only a basketful, and when he'd asked why so few, Kumo had laughingly remarked, "Eh, too many and we'd all shit like one mongoose." Perrin wasn't quite certain what _that_ meant, although he _had_ seen the small, ferret-like mammals near the 'garbage cans' behind the Chan's house. Bold creatures they were, too, barely moving aside and chittering at him when it came his turn to, "Please take out the trash, Perrin."

Over at another table, several aunties were preparing the raw fish for the poke by finely chopping mounds of ahi fillets 'Kimo's brother' had caught fresh that morning. Perrin had to wonder if that really was the bloke's name as he'd never heard anyone call him anything else. Regardless, the aunties' bright chatter, 'talking story' as Ben called it, masked the heavy silence blanketing _their_ table.

Perrin didn't like to think himself sullen, but the unexpected news from Aunty Malia early this morning still sent a hot throb of resentment through him. Harry and Severus weren't coming to Hana. He couldn't decide what upset him more: his keen disappointment, or that Aunty Malia wouldn't say why his guardians were staying at Hogwarts. Her evasions implied their reasons were trivial, but he just couldn't imagine Severus and Harry breaking their word unless it was really important. And regardless the reasons, didn't he deserve to know? Why would she hide them from him? Was it because she thought him too young, like some infant who couldn't take his pudding? If that were the case...

Aunty Nona's damp hand, closing over his own, drew his attention away from his brooding. Dainty fingers, filled with the magic he'd felt the moment he'd met her, gently turned his hand over, revealing the crumbled powder of the sturdy Opihi shell he'd unknowingly crushed, mixed with a few spots of blood where the sharp edges had cut the pad of his finger. He flushed, realising his worry and bitterness had inadvertently spread a bit farther than in his head. She smiled at him in understanding, a light tap of her finger healing the small wounds.

"Um, sorry," he said contritely, wiping the debris off his hands. "It's just... well, you know."

She nodded, the movement making the plumeria flower tucked behind her left ear quiver. "Eh, you know they'd be here, if they could," she said quietly.

"Maybe," Perrin hedged.

"Sulky boy." He flinched at the soft reprimand.

"Do _you_ know why?" he asked hopefully.

"No," she replied, and he could see the truth in her coffee-coloured eyes. "But I t'ink it's somet'ing serious," she added thoughtfully. "Like someone being sick. Maybe Albus had da kine, and they decided to stay with him," she speculated.

"Uncle Albus is sick?" Sarah asked, her eyes wide.

Was there no one on this blasted island who _didn't_ know 'Uncle Albus'?

"I don't know," Perrin replied cautiously. "I think so. Severus said something about Harry taking care of him." But he'd heard plenty through the rumour mill over the last term, the gossip going so far as to say that the headmaster was dying.

"Oh, I didn't know. I like Uncle Albus; he's funny and knows all these cool magic tricks. He pulled a flower out of my ear one time when I was little," Sarah said with a shrug of easy acceptance. "Uncle Harry is cool, too," she added thoughtfully glancing at him, "but Professor Snape is scary sometimes."

More than sometimes, Perrin thought with a small smile to himself. She didn't know the half of it.

"Good dancer, though," Aunty Nona said, her eyes sliding to him even as her hands went back to their work. As his jaw dropped, she grinned. "Didn't know that, did you?"

As Perrin shook his head, bemused, Sarah laughed. "Aia! I forgot about that--last summer at Aunty's house." Her eyes glazed in memory. "Uncle Ben practiced with him at the Halau; he won't teach any of us _that_ dance 'cause none of us are tall enough."

Severus? "Dance?" Perrin asked. He knew, of course, about the Halau; he'd gone there twice with Ben to watch, but even Kalani hadn't been able to talk him into trying it. He felt silly even thinking about it and the costumes... He couldn't even begin to imagine Severus doing anything like it in private, let alone in public.

"Yeah, it's this war dance done with these really long _Kala'au Kahiko_..." She stopped when Perrin made the sign they'd agreed upon when she'd said something he didn't understand. "Sticks, um, poles?"

Perrin nodded.

"Okay," she continued, her hands waving gracefully in description, "it's kinda complicated, but they beat the _Kala'au_ against each other's like they're fighting with them. The steps themselves are pretty easy, but it goes real fast. The Professor did okay, for a Haole."

Perrin thought he probably would. He'd heard stories about the magical staves some wizards used; perhaps Severus had one. And if he did, maybe he could get him to show it to him?

"Okay?" Kumo said incredulously, putting down his knife. Stabbing the air with his hands as if he were holding a _Kala'au_, he exclaimed, "Ho! It was so cool..."

"Eh, you can't talk story and work at the same time?" Aunty Nona lightly chided, pointing her knife at each of them.

Perrin flushed; he hated when he did that. He picked up another Opihi as Sarah said, "Yes, Aunty," her fingers digging into a half-peeled hull. Kumo said nothing with his mouth, but Perrin noticed Aunty didn't call _him_ a 'sulky boy'.

All too soon, Perrin's thoughts returned to his guardians' absence, and he realised Aunty had the right of it. It would have to be something serious for them to break their promise to him, although he couldn't help thinking it had nothing to do with the headmaster. Kani stirred restlessly on his shoulder and as he absently smoothed his ruffled feathers, he thought perhaps Ben or Kalani would tell him when they returned; they'd been out fishing when the news came. Whatever it was. The thought cheered him a bit.

Kani squawked and pulled his hair, his claws biting so deeply into the padding on Perrin's shoulder, he could feel the sharp tips scratching against his skin. Wincing, he was just about to berate his familiar when the owl took off with a raucous cry. Perrin watched him fly in erratic patterns just outside the lanai before disappearing from sight over the house. The anxiety he'd been trying to ignore grew as sharp as Kani's talons.

Face puckered, Sarah asked, "What's wrong with Kani?"

Perrin shrugged, dismissing the odd feeling. "Don't know. He's been acting strange since last night, though."

Shaking her head, Sarah bent back to her task. Hoping she didn't notice him staring, Perrin watched her peel the skin from another nut. He'd tried it earlier, and considering how hard the outer shell clung to the shelled nut inside, he thought her strong for a girl so tiny. He surreptitiously studied her delicate face--hapa, she'd called herself, half-Japanese, half-Hawaiian; even sunburnt, she was more ivory than brown. And exotic, with her long black hair piled atop her head haphazardly and held in place with a chopstick. She glanced up, her dark, almond-shaped eyes flashing with suppressed laughter.

His cheeks burning, Perrin turned back to his work and started shelling Opihi as if his life depended on it. A few moments later, Aunty Nona dusted off her hands with a happy, "Done!" and picked up her bowl of Limu, taking it with her to the other table of adults.

Watching her go, Sarah and Kumo leaned in close. "So... do you think it's Uncle Albus?" Kumo whispered loudly.

Perrin shook his head, his eyes never leaving Aunty Nona, who seemed engrossed by something Aunty Rina was saying. "No, and I don't understand; they both said they were looking forward to it. We'd been planning it for weeks."

Sarah sat back with a harrumph of disgust. "Aia! Adults are so weird."

True. But if it wasn't the headmaster, then what? Unless...? Perrin flashed back to the Christmas Holidays. Harry's accident in the lab. What if something had happened to one of _them_? Then he thought of _that_ night... Tony! The ward they'd given him. Oh, no! Suddenly the nagging disquiet crystallized into something horribly familiar.

"Ho, Perrin, what's wrong?" Sarah asked sharply, her hand on his arm.

"I have to find Ben or Kalani," he replied firmly.

.:0:. .:0:. .:0:. .:0:.

Quiesta's unusually quiet litany had lulled him into half-somnolence, but he never let go of Harry's hand. As Severus slowly came out of his exhausted stupor, he vaguely recalled other voices, one an unfamiliar, deep bass which had harshly demanded he step aside while it removed a curse. But he never did; he couldn't, not so long as Harry drew breath.

He could feel Quiesta now inside his Harry, could feel her presence resonate through their bond; she used it in the same manner a lame man uses a crutch to walk. As she systematically worked her way through Harry's injuries, Severus tensed, waiting with dread for the decisions he was certain would come. Would _he_ have to make the same sort of choices Ben had for Kalani last summer? Could he bear to do so?

When she finished, his mind reeled with gratitude that _his_ participation had proved unnecessary. He barely registered her brief embrace and whispered, "Harry has many good reasons to live, Severus," before she departed. Poppy had followed, her spells more for Harry's comfort and support for knitting limbs than any further healing. She'd lingered a few minutes when done, but he'd been unable to do more than stare at her in mute appeal. Worlds of sympathy in her eyes, she'd left him with a soft, "Only time will tell now, Severus."

Finally, they were alone; he knew they'd done all they could. Now it was up to him and Harry, and he wasn't certain he was strong enough to overcome the icy fear chilling him. Calm, he must be calm. Calm for Harry. Calm for _them_. He sank into their bond, into them, somehow enduring the ominous quiet within and begged Harry to heal, to _live_.

Severus hated vigils, hated every moment of uncertainty, hated the morbid thoughts racing through his head which his heart tried to stem with a hope that dimmed with each passing moment. As the hours wore on, his mind drifted. Harry's thighs gripping his broom as he chased the Snitch. Harry's legs clenching his hips as he gave him pleasure. Harry's eyes laughing when his mouth could not. Harry's eyes shut tight as his passion overtook him. Harry's infectious grin that still made his insides melt. Harry's grimace of pain as he fell before the Dark Lord. Harry's cherished touches, his fingers trailing tenderly down his face. Harry's fists striking him while caught in his nightmares. Harry's body curled around his pillow when he left him in the mornings. Harry's broken body sprawled half-dead over a tree root, his dreams shattered around him.

Harry. Always... "Harry," he choked in a harsh whisper. "Please. I don't know what I'd do... without..."

An arm slid firmly around his shoulders. A gnarled hand softly stroked his hair before pulling him close to rest his cheek against soft, worn robes and a snowy white beard. He breathed deeply, remembering all too well this same scent, an amalgam of worry and love and dread overshadowing those lingering of beeswax and lemon and hope. It was the smell of watching, of waiting, of other vigils too much like this one, endless vigils kept over a young man with piercing green eyes, eyes he was now terrified would never open again.

He shuddered. No! He mustn't go there, mustn't harbour such thoughts, for thinking them might just make them real. Clearing his throat, he spoke, his eyes nor his hand ever leaving his husband's. "How long..."

"I've been here since you first arrived."

He tried again. "I'm sorry, I didn't..."

An old hand silenced him. "Hush. You were otherwise occupied, and rightly so. You underestimate the power of love, Severus; Poppy says Harry would have died had you not held on."

A shiver ran through him. "He may still yet," he murmured.

The voice soothed, "I wouldn't say that, my dear boy. I've always had faith in you."

He knew that. He'd always known it. Always counted on it. But had he ever...? "Thank you," he whispered.

Albus said nothing but stayed with him for a long time while he talked to Harry. Whether he spoke the pleading words aloud he'd never know, for he knew Albus would never say, would never mention he'd embraced him as a beloved son, giving silent comfort and support when Severus had needed it most. And sometime later, when he knew not, he found himself alone again with his Harry. Truly alone, as he needed to be, his upper body stretched upon on the bed, his lips near Harry's hand. Still holding onto Harry. He was so tired; he could sleep a little while, why now he didn't know, nor did he question it. His lids heavy, he succumbed to his weariness, his thoughts and dreams only of Harry.

.:0:. .:0:. .:0:. .:0:.

His chest on fire, Harry groggily awoke in the depth of the night, when dreams turn real, with the secure feeling of one long fingered hand sunk in his hair, the tips touching his scalp, the other, pale and elegant in the candlelight, holding his as it lay still on the covers. Moving his eyes, he saw his exhausted spouse slumped forward in a chair by the bed fast asleep, his head on his arm, the inky hair spilling softly across Harry's wrist. With a deep feeling of déjà vu, Harry remembered that other time so long ago when he'd found himself in this same position, his feelings as yet unspoken, and how he'd so very much wanted to touch Severus' hair, of what he'd later wished he would have seen in Severus' eyes had they opened.

With a weak grin, he realised there was no reason he couldn't touch him now and, summoning the energy and breath, he ignored the stiffness and sharp pain to finger the soft, oily strands. Severus jerked awake, and the love and worry shining in his eyes gave to Harry everything his younger self had ever hoped.

Severus' hand tightened almost painfully on his as he croaked, "Harry?"

He had just enough left in him to stroke his thumb across the back of Severus' hand as he whispered, "Severus, love. Seems wishes _can_ come true," before plummeting back into the shadows.

.:0:. .:0:. .:0:. .:0:.

They found him first. Perrin had been asking Charlie if he'd seen Ben or Kalani when a broad hand grasped his shoulder. "Eh, looking for me?" Kalani asked, his easy smile belied by his serious eyes. Before Perrin could reply, the hand squeezed in warning as Kalani added, "Well, here I am. Come. We need to move the nets."

When Charlie and his boys offered to help, Kalani eagerly accepted and led the way to the tide-line where Ben and Malia stood facing each other by a jumbled pile of bulging nets lying neglected at their feet. If the flat line of Malia's mouth and Ben's drawn brows were any indication, Perrin would guess they'd been arguing.

"Ho! Good catch, brah," Charlie commented, easily swinging one of the nets over his shoulder. His two sons struggled with the second one, fuller than the other, but none of the men made a move to help them. With their burdens settled, they laughingly talked a while about the catch and how best to cook it. After a forever discussion over the merits of various people's grills, which Perrin impatiently ignored, some decision was obviously reached as Charlie and sons eventually left to join the large group of people cooking on the beach.

Perrin thought he would burst. "Why aren't they coming?"

As Ben drew breath to speak, Malia interrupted, "Now, Perrin, we've already discussed this--"

"No!" he shouted, his voice drowning hers. When he saw Kalani wince, he lowered the tone, but not the insistence. "Something's happened, something bad; I can feel it." He turned to Ben and Kalani, completely ignoring the older woman. "Why Aren't They Coming?"

Ben glared briefly at his mother-in-law and rubbed the back of his neck. "Not here, Perrin. Wait until we're inside the house."

Perrin nodded, even though he didn't like it. "All right," he said sullenly as the four of them set off in an uncomfortable silence across the sand. Black sand to match his black mood, he thought, ignoring the stares of those they passed. Halfway up the stairs to the lanai, Kani flew off the back of one of the chairs, landing neatly on Perrin's shoulder. Somehow the owl's presence made him feel better, less alone. As he passed her sitting with the other aunties, Aunty Nona patted his arm and smiled in encouragement. Her questioning eyes caught Malia's and she frowned. When Malia shook her head, Perrin wondered what _that_ was all about, but quickly dismissed it as Ben opened the door to the house.

The latch had no more snicked behind them when Ben held up his hand for silence, his eyes straying to Malia before returning to Perrin. "I'm sorry we weren't here when the message came through; you should have..." He hesitated and shrugged. "Never mind, it's not important now." He took a deep breath, his shoulders tensing. "There's been an accident--"

"Who?" Perrin interrupted, his fear so barely held in check, he could feel his magic dance along his skin. Kani trilled softly in his ear, a timely reminder, and he fought for calm and control. He glanced at Kalani, wincing inside at his stony expression so like Severus' when he'd let his mouth get ahead of his brain. "Sorry. Go on."

"Harry's been hurt, and Severus--" Ben stopped as if he couldn't find any more words.

Waiting this time to make certain Ben was done speaking, Perrin asked, "What happened?"

Ben replied with a sigh, "I'm not sure. International Floo calls are notoriously unreliable so Albus had to be brief. All he said was that Harry crashed his broom in the Forbidden Forest."

Why would Harry fly there when he had the whole Quidditch pitch to practice in? Was Ben was holding something back? He gritted his teeth against his mounting frustration and asked, "Is he all right?"

"We don't know," Kalani answered after a quick glance at Ben. "All we know is that Severus brought Harry back to the castle and they called in some specialists, but they'd only just arrived at the time." He paused before adding, "But he did say it's serious."

Perrin was trying to keep his voice reasonable, but these slow, half-answers were maddening, especially since they came from the two people he'd thought would be honest with him. "Have we heard anything since then?"

This time, the look the three of them exchanged was so blatant, the roiling in his gut blossomed into a full-blown anger. "I'm not an infant! Please, tell me. I need to know." He took a shuddering breath. "Is Harry going to die?"

Again there was that _look_ between them. Malia began, "The Floo failed half-way through, which is why I didn't--" She stopped as Ben cleared his throat loudly and stared at her, his arms folded across his chest. Making a noise of disagreement, Malia admitted reluctantly, "They don't know; he's still unconscious."

This time, finally, he'd got the full truth, and it scared him. "I want to go home."

Malia dismissed his request with a wave of her hand. "You should stay here, Perrin," she said reasonably. "Severus is with him and he's in the best of hands. There's nothing you--or any of us, for that matter--can do right now, except get in the way."

That did it! Perrin was only half-aware when he stepped forward into her personal space. "Harry's mine, too!" he shouted. "So is Severus!" Stunned, Malia could only gape. "I want to be there... Now. I can't leave them alone. They didn't leave _me_ alone. They took care of me. Don't you understand? I _need_ to go home." He tried to swallow a sob, but it came out half-choked. "Severus shouldn't be alone... He didn't leave me alone... Alone is... awful..." It was too much, and he was too far from home, and he didn't know...

Perrin dropped his face in his hands and turned away, his shoulders shaking. For one long moment the three adults stood stock still, each lost in their separate thoughts, but after an instant's communication held between locked eyes, Ben and Kalani reached out to Perrin.

Ben drew him close, relieved when the boy's too-thin arms wrapped around his ribs and held tight. Kalani stroked Perrin's hair awkwardly, and they let him cry. Their eyes met over the boy's head and Ben listened hard.

Something inside Ben whispered the boy grieved for far more than just Harry or Severus. Something sent from Kalani said Perrin needed this purging as much as he needed to go home. And they both hoped Malia could see this now; it was right that Perrin be there with Severus, that he share this crisis with the only family he had left. They were only Hanai, not true family, not yet anyway, and the only means they had to prove it to him was to let him go.

It was little effort for them to walk the boy to the sofa, still held fast, the wracking sobs eventually softening into minute shivers and half-gulped hiccups. Sitting on his other side, Kalani rubbed small circles on Perrin's back until he seemed calmer.

Raising his puffy face to them, Perrin murmured, " 'M, sorry--"

A light touch on his mouth stopped him. "It's all right, Perrin. You should never apologise for caring, okay?"

"All right," he said after a long pause.

Malia came back in the living room from the pantry, Joseph with her; Ben wondered when she'd left and realised she must have used the Floo they'd recently installed there. He held her gaze until she shrugged, seemingly indifferent, but he knew she still strenuously objected to what he was about to do. But no matter; it wasn't her call, it was his and Kalani's.

He sighed. He'd been appalled to learn they'd not told Perrin the full truth. After this was over, he was going to have a long talk with her. Just because she'd left her own children with Hanai parents did not necessarily mean she knew how to go about it herself. She needed to learn this was _not_ her child and that Perrin's guardians' wishes were paramount over her own inclinations. A lesson he needed to remember as well. She'd learn. They all would.

But for now, he turned back to the boy gazing at him with such trust. Amazing he could still do so after all he'd been through. "It will take a few minutes for Joseph to set the Portkeys; we'll have to go in stages. I'll go with you to see you there safely and to gather any news I can. In the meantime, let's get you packed."

"All right, Ben," Perrin said softly, pulling away. Darting back, he planted a quick kiss on his and Kalani's cheeks. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," he said, eyeing his husband as he stood beside Perrin.

Kalani placed his hand on Perrin's shoulder, squeezing it gently. "We'll get this right--someday." He held out a hand to Malia while Joseph walked into the kitchen to fetch some likely objects for the Portkeys. "Now, where'd you stash your suitcase?"

.:0:. .:0:. .:0:. .:0:.

Bleary-eyed, Severus stared at Perrin uncertainly, but only for a moment; the stark fear he witnessed in the boy's red-rimmed eyes was too reminiscent of his own for him to stay distant. Still holding Harry's hand, Severus held out his free arm, his robe sweeping with the motion. Perrin hesitated only a second before stepping to his side, allowing himself to be engulfed within the voluminous folds of soft fabric. Holding the boy's trembling body close to his side, Severus mutely thanked Ben standing slightly behind him.

Ben clasped his shoulder, the brief contact warm and laden with everything Severus liked about him. Moving away to stand by a nearby chair, Ben said quietly, "If you don't mind, I'd like to wait with you for a while." He paused and Severus could see the concern lining his face as his eyes flitted beyond him to the bruised form on the bed, the silence between them filled by the wheezing that punctuated every slow breath Harry took. When he nodded, unable to gather the words he needed, Ben met his gaze and smiled his understanding. "Thank you. They're not expecting me at home right away."

At Ben's words, Perrin stirred; Severus loosened his hold, chagrined he'd held the boy so tightly. Eyes that had been staring at Harry lying so still on the bed, turned to him, searching his face as he asked in a small voice, "Tony?" a host of horrors summed up in that one name.

"I'm not certain. I believe so, but I never did see Harry's assailant clearly," Severus answered him hoarsely.

"Tony did this," Perrin said quietly with deep conviction.

"How...?"

"I can _smell_ him."

Severus sniffed. Perhaps the boy was right. They wouldn't know until Harry awoke. _When_ Harry awoke.

Reluctantly releasing Perrin when he pulled away, Severus watched him hesitate before resolutely walking to the other side of the bed. He pulled a chair close and carefully took Harry's other hand. Only then did he look over Harry's still form to acknowledge Severus' intent gaze. Dry-eyed, he nodded to Severus, the gesture oddly adult.

Severus inclined his head in reply. Together, then, and they turned their attention to bringing Harry safely home, too.

.:0:. .:0:. .:0:. .:0:.

TBC


	3. Part III : The Flat of the Blade

Hiding Under The Ninth Earth  
**Book Four : A Two-Edged Sword**

**Part Three : The Flat of the Blade**

**5 August 2004**

Perrin blew the candles on his cake--all thirteen of them--and made his wish. A secret wish, hugged tight within him. A wish for something he'd overheard, something he was not supposed to know, but now that he did... How _much_ he wanted it scared him.

After his two families had cheered and clapped and slapped his back until he almost tipped into the small cake, Ben started another verse to the simple birthday song he claimed 'everyone' used. As the last "...happy birthday to you," faded in a mish-mash of voices somehow blending into one note, Harry blew out his own candles--all seven of them--two fat ones representing each decade with five smaller ones for the years. When he finally got them all extinguished in two panting breaths, he blushed, the colour a welcome addition to his too-pale cheeks and shadow-marred eyes. A small frown bracketed his mouth before it smoothed into a sheepish grin.

"That was pitiful," he rasped, as the others laughed and clapped just as they had for Perrin, but he noticed no one patted Harry the way they had him, even when he'd coughed a bit from the candles' smoke. And maybe that was because Severus was standing right behind his chair, his hand on his shoulder, as he had been ever since they'd started this double birthday party.

At first Perrin had thought Severus was helping Harry stay upright in the chair--he did still tire easily--but from the vantage of their weeks watching over Harry together, the way Severus' long fingers curled over Harry's shoulder told him it probably meant more. Perrin shrugged to himself, thinking it really didn't matter; he'd since learned that nothing about Harry or Severus was ever simple. It was much easier to concentrate on cutting his small cake, German Chocolate with a haupia centre, which was making his mouth water.

Letting the coconut frosting melt in his mouth, Perrin surveyed the small group gathered for his and Harry's belated birthdays. His guardians' living room was festooned with bright balloons and coloured streamers; confetti had been scattered all over the furniture which had been added to accommodate the extra guests. Most of them were gathered around Harry, now seated comfortably in his chair. Even seated next to him as they were, Ben and Kalani might as well as been in another room given they were laughing with the others, and that was fine. He'd not been back in Hana long enough to grow accustomed to so many people after the almost silent solitude he'd shared with Severus at Hogwarts.

It was odd to see Professor Lupin in Hana, but as he was here to visit Kahealani... Perrin was glad to see him looking so sunburnt and... well, healthy was the only word Perrin could think of. He'd always looked so--tattered at school, too thin, tired, his face pale and drawn. Now he was brown, his clothing new and Muggle, and his eyes shone as if he were happy.

Professor Lupin was standing next to Kahea', who had somehow managed to almost move Severus aside, her fingers running absently through Harry's hair. As Harry's eyes started closing, his face growing lax and free of any discomfort, Perrin smiled to himself. She'd done that same thing to him a couple of times before and he knew it felt good and soothing. Watching Harry gradually sag into the chair, he wondered if maybe everyone was wrong when they said she had little magic. Maybe she _was_ magic instead. That Harry slept without the potions just reinforced the notion. And obviously Severus thought the same thing as their eyes met across the room in that silent communication they'd developed over the previous weeks.

Ever watchful, Ben was the first of the others to notice Harry's slumber. He touched Kalani's arm and the two of them quietly gathered everyone to leave. While they all said their quiet good-byes, Malia banished all the party debris, the balloons and streamers the last to go, leaving the living room spotless. A brief hug and a, "Happy birthday, my dear," later she and Joseph were gone, followed by Professor Lupin and Kahea'; now only Ben and Kalani remained.

While Ben talked to Severus in the kitchen, Kalani sat next to him on the sofa. "Sorry it was such a short birthday."

Perrin smiled. "It's all right. Cake was good."

Kalani grinned. "Aia!" he exclaimed softly. "A birthday should be longer, especially since this is your first one here."

"First one at all in a long time," Perrin muttered, then added in a normal tone, "it was a good birthday. Even better with Harry here."

"True," Kalani said thoughtfully, looking over at the two still standing in the kitchen. Perrin followed his gaze and was surprised to see that Severus and Ben seemed to be arguing. Well, maybe that wasn't the right word, but Ben was talking fast, his hands graceful as they moved about, and Severus was glowering. Just as he was about to look away, Severus' head turned and their gazes locked. Perrin didn't know what Severus was trying to convey, if anything, but he recognized worry when he saw it, especially when that intense stare turned to Harry before returning to him. Severus' eyes softened for a moment before he turned back to Ben and nodded in resignation with a long sigh.

Kalani chuckled. "Ah, I see they finally reached a compromise--" He stopped as they watched Severus flinch away when Ben put his hand out to him, its forward movement halted smoothly and retracted as if it had never happened. Kalani sighed. "I wish he'd let him help," he remarked, his gaze dropping to the floor.

"Who?" Perrin asked. "Severus?"

Kalani nodded once, his chin pointing in his husband's direction. "Ben hides it well, but it--hurts him when Severus pushes his friendship away like that."

Perrin thought about it a moment, remembering their past interactions at Hogwarts. It was different this time. "I don't think that's what he means, it's just... He sometimes does the same thing to Harry, too, but _he_ usually scolds him for it." Or teased him out of it.

Kalani chuckled. "Yeah, I can imagine. Harry wears his feelings like his clothing--big, baggy, and comfortable."

It was Perrin's turn to smile. Harry's open affection and the way he could make Severus laugh made him think of his dad when he was little. And maybe that was why Severus was still so grim; Harry hadn't been around to make him smile and even now that he was, his easy style had been markedly absent as he fought for his health.

"Maybe, but I think right now Severus is lonely and he can't stop, not until..." When Kalani looked at him sharply, he tried to explain, "When Harry was so sick, Severus kind of--" Perrin paused, searching for a way to make the other man understand. "It was like watching ice cubes melt in the sun until they're a puddle of water that just evaporates until it's all gone." And it had hurt to see Severus hurting. "He didn't talk to hardly anyone. It was like he was... like he was shrinking the sicker Harry got."

Kalani nodded and glanced over at the two men still talking in the kitchen, Severus looking steadily at the floor, Ben leaning closer as he spoke quietly. Perrin noticed Kalani catching and holding Ben's attention, his eyes glazing like those of someone listening hard. Ben nodded and a few moments later, when he touched Severus' shoulder, he didn't withdraw his hand when Severus twitched away, keeping it there until Severus relaxed.

As if this were his cue, Kalani stood and joined his husband. After he and Ben made their good-byes, they waited patiently for Perrin out on the lanai while he helped Severus put Harry to bed. With levitation spells and too much practice, it didn't take very long for Severus to spell Harry into a pair of sleep pants while Perrin rearranged the piles of pillows in their proper place, a duvet smoothed across the whole for Harry to lie on. Once Harry was settled partially on his side, Perrin kissed his cheek and prepared to leave. Severus pulled the other duvet up under Harry's chin, and Perrin knew his attention was already focussed on the man whose face he lightly stroked. Watching the small gesture, he wondered if Harry knew just how much Severus feared being left behind. Perrin could understand that; it was one of his biggest fears, too.

But not so much anymore. Before he'd taken a step to leave, Severus stopped him with a hand on his arm. Briefly running his fingers through Perrin's hair, he lightly touched his cheek with his fingertips. His eyes intent on Perrin's face, Severus nodded, and Perrin smiled back at him.

Walking to the front door, their nightly ritual completed to both's satisfaction, Perrin pondered just how far they'd come. After the last few weeks, he had few doubts about Severus' affections and any nervousness he'd felt with the Potions master of old had been completely stripped away by their mutual worry for Harry. And love. He could admit it now, if only to himself: he loved them both.

Joining Ben and Kalani on the lanai, they set off on foot to go to their home. The night fine and clear, Perrin let his thoughts wander while his Hanai guardians talked quietly together; that they respected his silence was another thing to like about them.

While he would have preferred being with Harry and Severus, he didn't mind staying with his Hanai family. He knew why; Severus needed to take care of Harry. He knew from the first few days after Harry had awakened that there were some _things_ Harry felt uncomfortable anyone but Severus seeing, and that was fine, too. So when they'd come back to Hana, and Ben had suggested he stay with them to give Severus and Harry some privacy, he'd reluctantly agreed. But now? Now he wanted to be with them whenever he could. They were his family and he liked to think they needed him, too, but after yesterday's fiasco with Malia, it was...

Ben's low voice caught his attention and he listened hard.

"...your mother is so stubborn."

Kalani chuckled. "Sorry, love. The family comes with the bed."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I hated having to punish him..."

"You did fine. You punished the response, not the reason, and that's what's important. Maybe next time he'll _think_ before he acts."

"Don't hold your breath," Ben muttered so softly Perrin could barely hear him.

"Eh, do I _look_ blue?"

Perrin grinned in the dark and realised he was eavesdropping, again, but considering what he'd learned yesterday when he'd done so... Well, as his mother once said, sometimes good things come out of bad.

Almost to the Chan's house, he was suddenly very tired and the unexpected arm around his shoulders felt good. Leaning a bit into Kalani was nice, as was the quiet, "Almost home now, Perrin. Bed's sure gonna feel good after such a long day."

Yeah, he got that right.

.:0:. .:0:.

Severus yawned wide, his near-silent slicing of Hyssop stopping while his eyes squeezed shut over his gaping jaw. His eyes tearing, he wiped them with the cuff he'd made just below his elbow when he'd rolled up the sleeve, and resumed his cutting, the candles illuminating his work casting odd shadows beyond the small space he occupied. Swallowing another yawn, his hands picked up the pace as fast as he dared without making a sound or risking his hands. Hurry, damn it. Had to get this done before Harry woke. They were almost out of the coughing potion and while he was quite certain the batch Joseph had brought with him this evening was more than adequate...

Ignoring his little nagger calling him twice the fool, he dumped the preserved Hyssop into the cauldron, spelling the area clean for the Comfrey to follow. Not too much longer now.

This had been so much easier at Hogwarts, where the bed didn't give a flying fuck how many people were sleeping in it. Whose idea had it been anyway to bring Harry to Hana? A question to which his cackling internal companion answered the obvious: he had. Well, there was no help for it now. While he'd reinforced Kahea's efforts with a sleeping spell, there was no telling how long it would be--

"Sev'rus?"

Damn it! He needed more time. "Yes, Harry?"

"Sev... Come to... bed..." The sleepy voice called quietly, every word thickening with each gasping hesitation.

Severus immediately set the knife aside and spelled his hands clean. Almost running to the bed, he grabbed his last bottle--damn it, not enough--and reluctantly added Joseph's to the bedside table. Sitting on the bed's edge, he helped Harry sit up and leaned him against him, chest to chest. Harry's struggle for air mounted and he could feel his spouse's desperate efforts not to panic as the fluid slowly seeped into his lungs.

Holding Harry against him, his other hand summoned Joseph's bottle. He popped the cork with a practiced thumb and, once Harry was steady, poured some of the thick creamy liquid into his palm. Its colour and consistency looked all right. He sniffed it; it smelled the way it should. Hastily spreading the tingling liquid across his palms, he placed one flat on Harry's back over the raw, puckered scar, the other almost wedged between them on his chest in the same place. With firm pressure, he distributed the potion evenly, rubbing it well into the skin on both sides. Once the tingling left his hands, he tugged up the duvet Harry had been lying on, pulling it over his spouse's back and shoulders to keep him warm; the potion worked faster with heat.

As expected, Harry started coughing. Deep, barking coughs that shook Severus down to his toes. Coughs that brutally forced their way out but left no time in between to gather air to fuel their violence. Harry started choking. Desperate hands grabbed his shoulders, squeezing new bruises into old ones as the potion worked to break up the mucus and fluid lodged in Harry's still-healing lungs. His hand already reaching for a second potion on the table, he slid the lid aside, and pulling away so he could reach Harry's face, he held the steaming vial under his nose.

"Breathe, Harry. Breathe it in." Harry shook his head, his eyes watering from the acrid fumes. "I know, I know," he soothed, "it smells awful and tastes worse." He watched the tendrils enter Harry's mouth and nose, only to be blown back by the next paroxysm of coughing. "There... Not quite... Try another." Harry finally got a deeper breath as the first potion took full effect and Severus watched in satisfaction as Harry got a full dose of the second potion. He slid the lid back in place and set it aside. Pulling him close against him, he rubbed his back, trying to calm him. "Ah, see? Breathe it in deeply, love. Hold it... Hold it..." Harry's breath released in a rush. "There you go..." Thank the gods, it was almost over.

He pulled away again, awaiting the last phase. His eyes fixed on Severus, Harry panted shallowly as his face lost its crimson colour, but as before, it was too pale and only Severus could see the pinpricks of red under the skin's surface where his coughing had forced his body's blood into the pores. Harry opened his mouth. "Shhh. Don't speak. I know, you hate this part." Harry nodded even as Severus reached for a shallow Ever-clean Bucket. Almost on cue, Harry started coughing again, deep, wet barks Poppy would have called 'productive'. This time Severus eased him until he was bent over the side of the bed as his lungs forcibly expelled the blockage plaguing it. As each gob hit the bucket and disappeared, Severus observed with gratitude that they were free of any tinge of pink or red or yellow; it hadn't always been the case when Harry had been unconscious. Nor was there as much as there'd once been. He sighed, helping Harry to sit up.

"Better?" he asked, searching Harry's face for signs of further distress.

"Sore," Harry replied hoarsely, rubbing his stomach. He winced briefly and Severus could see the cramp rippling across his abdomen.

He pulled his wand. "That I _can_ fix," he said, wishing he could fix everything else, but Quiesta had said they needed to do this with as little magic as possible; the 'unrepair' curse Mendino had used on Harry's broom had caused just as much damage to Harry as it had his Firebolt. And while it had been removed, the aftereffects still lingered; it would take some time--at least a month--for them to completely dissipate. So until then, Harry had to heal in this mostly-Muggle manner.

Harry relaxed with his small spell. The crisis over, he eased his husband back against the mound of pillows keeping him partially elevated so he could breathe easier and pulled the covers up around him. As he stood to go back to work, Harry grabbed his hand. "No, Sev'rus, not tonight... it can wait... you have enough... Joseph made it fine... Come to bed... please," he panted, the effort of forcing sufficient air to speak painful to watch.

Exhaustion pulled at him. Perhaps?

"Please?"

How could he resist? "Considering I've never been able to deny you anything--" he yawned again "--Brat."

Harry grinned, and while it may have been a watery version of its normal brilliance, it still made Severus' insides melt.

He quickly changed into sleep pants and slid under the covers, checking to make certain the duvet covered Harry evenly before he laid down himself. Harry turned on his side to face him; Severus sighed and adjusted the covers accordingly, then summoned some additional pillows so that their faces were level with each other. He could tell Harry wanted to talk.

"Is Perrin still grounded?" Harry whispered.

"Yes, but Ben and I reached a compromise; it ends in three days. He can come here during the day if you wish it and help as he usually does in the evenings," Severus replied, his low rumble sounding loud when compared to Harry's breath-saving pitch.

"I'll make certain I 'wish' for it often, then. Poor kid, only back in Hana two days before he got into trouble."

"One must consider the source; Malia's carping would drive a saint to sin. Perrin can be forgiven his outburst, but not his running off as he did."

Harry sighed. "True, but this grounding thing confuses me. What's the point? Perrin _likes_ being alone sometimes."

Severus had to agree; the boy held to himself far too much. However, limiting him to his room had seemed _far_ too lenient for placing himself at such risk when he'd run off from Malia's home yesterday. That is until Ben had commented this evening that perhaps _his_ over-reaction was more fuelled by Harry's recent brush with Mendino than anything the boy had done. And, damn him, he'd been right.

"Well, for now, it's not our concern. He's Ben and Kalani's responsibility, while ours is to--.

"I know, get me well." He sighed, shifting a bit closer and Severus couldn't resist the silent plea any more than any thing else Harry wanted. While he couldn't hold him the way he so desperately wanted, he could touch him, and did, his hand carding through Harry's hair and stroking his cheek and shoulder.

"Hmmm," Harry purred, resting his hand on Severus' chest. Eyes half-lidded in pleasure, he said, "Did Joseph ever find out where he went?"

"No."

"Mmmm. I think he came to the house."

Severus had thought so, too, but had held his tongue on the matter. Moving closer, his hand stole across Harry's waist as he replied. "You may be right."

"Think he heard what we were talking about with Ben and Kalani? About the adoption proceedings?"

"Perhaps. It's possible."

Harry nodded, his eyes gleaming in the candlelight. "Well, we'll never know." Harry chuckled. "That boy can keep a secret better than you."

"Faint praise, indeed, considering how well I can keep one from you."

"Well, that doesn't count." Harry smiled. "Vee haf our vays..."

Severus silently chuckled at the image Harry sent him through their open bond. Well, almost fully open; there was a small part he kept to himself, the part full of shadows and worry. Harry had enough on his plate without him serving up _his_ sour fare.

He startled when Harry gently kissed his cheek. When had he got so close? "You take such good care of me," he whispered. "I'm sorry I'm such a lousy patient."

Gods, he wanted to pull him into his arms and hold him, but knew Harry would just start coughing if he did. He tightened his hand on his waist. "You're just fine," he replied, kissing that tempting mouth. Just a bit. Anything more and he might lose his tightly leashed control.

Pulling back, Harry yawned. Faces inches apart, he stared at Severus until his eyelids started drooping. With a contented sigh, he snuggled into the pillows, his hand dropping to Severus' arm still wrapped around his waist. Before long he'd settled into the even breathing of sleep and if there was a little wheeze behind it, Severus ignored it in light of the satisfaction he felt that Harry was breathing at all.

He sternly banished the morbid thoughts threatening to chase each other through his head all night if he let them. For now, there was only Harry and he intended to savour his presence as long as he could.

A lifetime sounded about right.

.:0:. .:0:.

**7 August 2004**

Sitting out on the rocks in his customary 'brooding spot', as Harry had so aptly named it, Severus 'felt' Perrin approach shortly before he saw him, his magic as familiar as Albus' or Harry's. No others could he read in this manner, but the lack didn't bother him. As was their new custom, Perrin sat quietly on the rock without speaking, his eyes fixed on the heavy pewter waves and red riptide flags lining the beach that would have kept him from practicing with Kalani all day had he been able.

"Harry's still sleeping; I looked in on him before I left and set my wand the way you taught me to let me know when he wakes."

Severus nodded. His, too, was set the same way, only it also monitored pain levels and respiratory distress. He repressed the urge to physically check on his spouse; he understood all too well Harry's growing need for solitude and he'd already indulged his compulsion more than he ought.

He shuddered. That compulsion, conceived when he'd found Harry as broken as his Firebolt, had been birthed the night they'd actually lost him. With Harry's fever spiking higher than ever, his lungs labouring to catch even the smallest sips of air, Poppy and Quiesta had been at a loss. With the curse's lingering effects, there'd not been much they could do, no cure that hadn't already been tried. All they could was wait... and hope.

To Severus' heart, in that night of crisis, Perrin forever crossed the invisible line between ward and son. United, they'd sat side-by-side, both of them holding Harry's hand: Severus' on the bottom, Perrin's on the top. And in the deepest night, when their hope ebbed its lowest, Harry stopped breathing. One second became two, became more, and even Severus' inner urgings couldn't bring it back. Their own lungs burned with the air they dared not release as Quiesta tied Harry to herself in a last ditch _Sanos_ effort to save him. The hours passed, Harry's chest rising and falling in unison with a healer rapidly falling into exhaustion.

Then it happened; just after dawn Harry took a breath out of synch, a breath of his own. And another, and still more, until Quiesta sank to her knees at the head of the bed, her quiet sobs of relief muffled by Poppy's robes as she stabilized Harry once more.

It still haunted his dreams.

When Harry's fever broke the next night, Perrin's wide-eyed, cautious hope had matched his own. Later the following morning, when Harry regained consciousness and it was clear he would recover, he regretted that Perrin had slipped away so soon afterwards, even though he returned several times over the next week to visit them. Severus supposed it had as much to do with Perrin's shyness around those who gathered to celebrate, as much as his sense of how much he was needed. Their involvement in Harry's day-to-day care had started soon after, and Severus had been pleased with the boy since then.

Well, except for the incident with Malia the other day and, considering she could wear the skin off a Norwegian Ridgeback with her nagging, he privately thought she deserved the scare. Hopefully she'd learned something as well from the incident.

Although Perrin steered a wide path around her, at least he seemed at ease with _them_. In the evenings, before Kalani or Ben came to take him home, the three of them usually retired to the old sofa, Harry leaning on him on one side, Perrin tucked against him on the other, while they perused the Muggle travel books Ben had left on their half-empty bookcases.

"Are we still going to Hale'akala tomorrow?" Perrin asked, shifting slightly.

"Reading my mind, are you?" Severus asked, a smile playing on his lips.

"Well, except for my time here, I _am_ still grounded," Perrin commented.

True, but with the compromises... "Yes, we are still going, but only because I don't want to disappoint Harry; he's been looking forward to the trip and _he_ didn't do anything half so foolish." Well, actually, he had, and Severus wondered if there was a way to 'ground' Harry in the future. The thought made him smile to himself.

"I'm sorry," Perrin said, a picture of contrition. Severus supposed he was now that he understood the risks better.

"I know you are; that was supposed to be the point of isolating you from your friends. You were supposed to think. Did you?"

"Yeah, but I still haven't found an answer to one of my problems."

"And that is?"

"What to do about Aunty Malia. She's still thinks I'm a little boy, like I don't know what's best for me."

"And you've shown such great judgement recently?" Severus asked somewhat heatedly.

Perrin huffed. "I said I was sorry! I just couldn't take her harping any more. On and on and on about what a terrible, spoiled boy I was. I'm not _that_ terrible." He slid his eyes to Severus. "Besides, how can I make 'informed choices' if I'm not informed?"

Touché. Merlin, he sounded like Harry at that age, although Perrin was far more polite. However, Perrin wanted something, Severus could feel it as surely as he could feel the wind whipping the waves in front of him. Damn! The boy should have been a Slytherin. So, did he let him get to it in his own convoluted time, or would the more direct approach be better?"

"Malia may have the personality of a fish-wife at times, but she still deserves your respect," he began, ignoring Perrin's snicker. "What did you have in mind?"

Perrin's eyes widened. "I-I--" He closed his mouth with a snap.

"Well?" he asked, highly amused he'd flustered the boy--yes, the direct approach had its merits. "Out with it. I only sprout fangs at Hallowe'en."

Perrin looked at him sharply, then his face relaxed into a grin. "It's just-- I was thinking--"

Severus snorted.

"Well, I was! I was thinking that if I had an emergency Portkey, I could leave... if I had to," he supplied in a rush. He watched him cautiously.

Severus nodded; he and Harry had already discussed this. "The idea has merit, but _not_ for the reasons you've given."

Perrin swallowed hard. "Why, then?"

"If you wish me to spell it out for you, I will, but I've reasonable confidence in your intelligence and, given your recent chastisement, I'm certain you can figure it out for yourself.

Perrin nodded, his face a mask of concentration. "That's a much better reason than mine."

"Yes, it is. A spat with an overbearing female does not constitute an insurmountable crisis; if it did, I would have euthanised Professor McGonagall years ago." Perrin blinked, then laughed. "The answer to your 'problem' with Malia is to patiently await either Ben or Kalani's return. They are quite aware of our inclinations; you would be permitted to return to Hogwarts any time you wish to come home."

"Any time?"

"One would hope that, in the natural order of things, you'd be so comfortable with your Hanai family and be having so much 'fun' you'd be reluctant to return, but, yes, anytime--for any reason."

Perrin looked back to the ocean. "Thank you," he said so quietly the wind almost carried off his words before Severus could hear them. "I won't abuse it."

No, he didn't think he would, in fact, now that Perrin had an 'out', he suspected the boy would tough it out more often than not.

As they went back to their comfortable silence, he thought about what he hadn't said. That they'd also decided to ask Flitwick to teach Perrin to Apparate. In another year he would be allowed to go to Hogsmeade, the perfect place for an ambush, and Harry was adamant he not be held back. He had to agree; they couldn't shelter him forever and he should be allowed to grow with his peers. Given his age, it would take him that long to learn to do it smoothly, but he had every confidence in Flitwick's tutelage; he'd taught _him_ at fifteen, after all. A bit of a rule-bender, their Filius.

He almost laughed aloud. Weren't they all?

.:0:. .:0:.

**12 August 2004**

Pulling heavily with both hands gripping his cane, Harry painfully hauled himself to his feet, his chest burning with the exertion. With the cane's support, he half-shuffled his careful way across the sand, hoping he could make it to the house without falling flat on his face. Damn his legs! They were still stiff and sore despite the healing, but he knew that was only to be expected.

He slowed, then stopped as he heard the familiar voice query, "Harry? Are you all right? Where are you going?" Well, he'd only thought Severus was asleep.

He half-turned to see his spouse already rising from the beach mat they'd placed on the sand near the house. He stifled his impatience at Severus' fussing; given his husband's hollowed-eyed condition when he'd finally awakened, and seeing the worry haunting those dark eyes even now, he _knew_ Severus had earned every right to mother-hen him. But still... With a sigh, he replied lightly, "I'm fine. Call of nature, you know. Must have been the beer."

Severus raised a brow and pointedly turned his head to stare at the ocean. Oh, right. Harry grinned sheepishly; it did seem a bit silly to hike all the way to the house with the vast Pacific Ocean only a few steps away, but still... One did feel a bit odd using it as a loo, even if everyone else did so. What had Kalani said the first time he'd suggested it? "Eh, the fish don't care." Which was probably true.

He carefully turned back the short distance he'd managed, mindful of where he placed his clumsy feet; his hips weren't quite 'there' yet, either. When Severus met him halfway and tucked his arm within his own as they walked down to the water, he bit back his automatic, "I don't need any help." Given the way his back and shoulders hurt, it would have been a lie anyway, but still... As he passed it, he tossed the cane onto the mat; no sense getting it wet. Feeling more drained and out of breath than he wanted to admit, they waded out till the water was mid-chest and... Well, he did feel much better afterwards.

At least now Severus gave him some privacy for his more... personal ablutions. Before it had been almost painful to endure his mostly silent hovering, as if he, Harry, would disappear if he took his eyes off him. Yet Harry couldn't bring himself to say anything about it. He'd clearly heard the awe in people's voices when they told him in quiet whispers how Severus had refused to leave his side, had refused to let him go, sustained only by what sustenance Dobby and Perrin could force down his throat and the cleansing charms Poppy claimed she employed every day, "Whether he wanted it or not." To hear Severus grouse the rare times he spoke, it was more 'or not' than anything else.

And there was a surprise: Perrin. When his muzzy brain had finally checked in with the rest of his aching body, Severus' presence at his bedside had hardly been shocking, but the boy's as well? To hear Kalani talk, the normally shy Perrin had proved ferocious when denied the right to come home to be with him. Who would have guessed? And once at Hogwarts, Poppy had reported he'd given as much care to Severus as to him--or at least as much as his husband would let him. Which from Albus' account was more than he'd allowed anyone else. All other things aside, _that_ in itself made him feel good. He was happy to see the tensions between them, subtly present ever since Perrin's emotional explosion on Boxing Day, had dissipated until they were more like the father and son Harry had hoped they would be.

However, Severus' unnatural quiet bothered him and the few times he'd tried to draw him out of whatever purgatory he'd placed himself, it was like conversing with a stone wall. It was as if Severus was afraid that if he ever let loose that which was tightly bottled inside him, something bad would happen, so he said nothing. He'd seen this phenomenon with some of his patients' families before, but had never expected it to happen to him--not that he'd ever anticipated a fool's chase would almost kill him.

Harry suspected no one had guessed just how much of himself Severus had expended during his vigil, but on those nights when he woke from his potion-induced slumber, when everything was quiet, Harry could hear the torn remnants of his husband's ordeal echoing through his restless dreams. But still... He missed their easy banter, missed Severus' caustic 'observations' on every subject from the state of Hogwarts to the sand creeping up his shorts; he hoped this month in Hana before the start of the new term would mitigate it. Severus needed this time to heal as much as he did; the rest, he thought, would take care of itself over time and a return to normalcy.

He waded over to the solitary figure, the water a heavy weight against his legs and torso but not unduly so. Loosely wrapping his arms around the too-lean waist, he pressed close against Severus' back, revelling in the warmth flowing between them. Their bond had never been so open. While Severus testily claimed it was only so he could tell when Harry was down-playing his discomfort, Harry knew better and loved him too much to ever mention his husband's lingering _need_ to be close to him all the time.

Severus turned in his arms to face him and held him fast, while feathering his lips with one of those slow, tender kisses Harry loved. For the first time since his accident, his body eagerly responded to the length pressed so close to his own. He pulled back, mutely begging for more kisses, more _serious_ kisses, and it was a measure of Severus' recent insecurities that he gave them to him despite his internal misgivings--hot, wet kisses unhindered by any of his usual modesty in public.

Merlin, how he'd missed this, missed the tight tangle of bodies striving for pleasure, missed Severus' magic mouth claiming his own in a kiss that could curl his toes and melt their hearts and bodies into one. For him, it had only been weeks; for Severus, it had been an imagined lifetime of deprivation. During his convalescence--and Harry had been increasingly aware of just how much Severus was holding back--he'd been careful to limit their intimacies to gentle touches and almost hesitant caresses, all of which made Harry feel cherished and loved, but still...

Right now, though, there was nothing chaste about Severus' attentions, and for the burning heat rising between them, Harry was grateful. Somehow his spouse had manoeuvred them into slightly deeper water and with the water's warm buoyancy and Severus' hard hips grinding flashes of delight into his own, what had once been pain floated easily into passion.

This time Harry didn't mind Severus supporting him, didn't complain about the arms keeping him aloft as he wrapped his legs around Severus' calves. All he cared about was Severus' lips meshing perfectly with his own. Severus' tongue dancing fire with his, mimicking the movements of their bodies below. Severus' hands digging furrows in his back and arse with each enthusiastic thrust. He needed this; they both did and he threw himself into their loving with everything he had to give. Worries and vigils and midnight visions of loss were cast aside as pure need and _life_ exploded from within them, the soft murmur of the ocean swallowing their unfettered cries of joyful ecstasy.

With their breathless bodies sated and limp, the milky evidence of their reunion floating away with the tide, Harry irreverently decided the fishes probably didn't care much about _that_ either. Severus gradually released his mouth, their lips clinging as if reluctant to separate. Hidden in the dark behind closed lids, Harry laid his cheek on Severus' shoulder and slid his legs down, Severus' arm steadying him until he found his footing on the sandy bottom. Hands which had grasped and pulled, now moved freely over slick skin, soothing the small pangs caused by their ardour.

Opening his eyes, Harry sought Severus' immediately, but was denied as Severus wouldn't meet his gaze, his face down-turned. Burying one hand in Harry's hair, Severus nuzzled his neck above the waterline, briefly resting his forehead on the soft spot where shoulder meets throat, before his questing mouth moved upwards to capture Harry's in the sweetest kiss they'd ever shared. And if Severus' hoarse whispers of love sounded more like broken sobs and his lips tasted saltier than the ocean supporting their embrace? Well then, Harry would close his eyes again to pretend he'd not noticed and instead convey with caressing hands and an open heart that he loved and needed Severus more than he could ever express with mere words.

Eventually they waded back to the beach, the pull of gravity dragging on a body recently accustomed to the weightlessness of the water. This time he needed Severus' assistance and, with a breathless noise of thanks, gratefully sank onto the beach chair, Severus sitting cross-legged at his side on the mat. Wiggling his toes into the hot sand, Harry popped a Samuel Adams from the cooler (for his husband refused to drink that 'piss-water' Ben had supplied) and handed it to Severus before securing one of his own.

Settling into the seat, the beer cold down his throat, he gazed out over the ocean, eyes searching for the two specks he suspected would still be out there. Sure enough, he found Perrin and Kalani farther down the shore about a hundred feet out. He blinked and adjusted his far vision just in time to see Perrin stand on the board, Kalani nearby. A quick glance to his side showed Severus watching the same tableau, his gaze concentrated and alert, but surprisingly not concerned. He turned back in time to see Perrin ride a few feet ahead of a small breaker before tumbling off the board as it overtook him.

Without removing his eyes from the spot where the boy had gone down, he sighed in relief when his head bobbed back into sight. "Severus, are you certain he's all right?" he asked, unable to hide the worry in his voice.

"Kalani's with him," Severus replied as if that made everything fine. Perhaps, to Severus, it did, but still...

While Harry himself was an adequate swimmer, he'd yet to try what Perrin and Kalani had been practicing for hours every day since his grounding had been lifted. Sometimes the boy's single-minded determination was scary. He held his breath as Perrin went down after another nasty fall from the long wooden board, this time under the arch of a much larger wave. He was about to start vocally urging Kalani to go fetch him when Perrin re-appeared, quite far from where he'd disappeared.

Pushing his heart back into his rib cage, Harry remarked, "It just seems so... dangerous."

Severus turned to him with both brows raised, the first real smirk Harry had seen in weeks gracing his face. "With what _you_ got into at twelve?" His chuckle was raspy. "Surfing seems fairly tame."

Well, yes, there was that, and Harry grinned, happy to see Severus' smile broaden into laughter. Running his arm across Severus' shoulders, he relished the weight of his head as he leaned it against his ribs, and suddenly, the day seemed ever so much brighter.

.:0:. .:0:.

TBC


End file.
